05 May 07 10:11 am
Black_Rozez = Final Days...
Pack Up Your Bags And Say Goodbye.
No matter who you are, you all have a best friend and know what its like to have them there for you, to listen when you feel like screaming, to comfort you when all you can do is cry, to be close when you feel like no one cares and to tell your secerts that you fear no one would understand. Well, my best friend is my cat Ginger, and today was difficult for me.
I guess I'd better explain? Well today we went through some of the final stages of prepareing to move out of this house, keeping in mind that we'll be staying at nana's only untill the viza's are passed, so we had to pack what valuables we want to take to the USA and say our good byes. Sorting between old memories of things I had kept, and what I could throw away became difficult towards the end, I've half packed my little suit case with clothes and I'm going to put in little things that mean the world to me.
Everything we didn't need anymore was put out on the front lawn today for a yard sale, while this was going on I was busy in my room going through everything, my mums friend and my mum were busy about the house sorting and clearing everything. In the evening two of our close friends Laurie and Stu came to see us and I have this incredible bond with Stu he understands me so well and we just get on, on this whole other level, there was a lot of weird silences because they knew today would be the last time they saw us, and as they left today I almost cried because I felt like that peice of me was breaking away. Him and his GF are such incredible people and I cant even begin to explain the understanding between him and myself, nor the level of understanding. To put it the best way I can.
He. Gets. Me.
Towards the end of the evening my mums friend, my mother and myself were to tired to continue on the house and pretty much everything had been done and gone. [I'm still working on my room tomorrow I'm near finished] And the house is begining to look bare. Then mum said we had to go and do the one thing I'd been dreading all day. Drop the cats off at her friends place to look after [Sooty - Mums cat, will be staying there forever, but my cat Ginger will only be there till we can bring him to the USA]
As I picked Ginger up in my arms it dawned on me that he wont be around for a while, I wont be able to hug him and cry on his fur when I feel upset, I wont be able to talk to him and have him listen, and I wont be able to hear his purr in an attempt to make me feel better. Putting him into the cat cage knowing he was going away to some strange place, that he could think I'm abandoning him was like ripping my heart out. I'm scared he will try and run home and get hit by the speeding cars on the road. I tried talking to him to calm him down and I was having trouble keeping calm myself, tears rolling down my cheeks I couldnt stop them even though I tried.
The drive to mums friends place I wish had of taken longer, I wanted to comfort Ginger but he wouldnt even let me touch him through the cat cage. When we finally got there and I got him out he was about as unsure about the place as I was, I didn't trust the speeding cars out side, and I dont trust the dogs down around the area. I gave him one of my blankets so he can have my sent to comfort him, but when i went to leave he ran towards me as if to say 'dont leave me' and I had to try so hard not to cry again. It was like walking away from your best friend knowing that any number of things could happen, leaving them and them thinking they are abandoned. I tried to calm down in the car on the way home and I did a little bit but when I went to come inside I kept looking around hopeing to see him, and had to remind myself he was not there.
Tomorrow my grandmother and grandfather are driveing up, we are packing up everything and we are leaving. This means I don't know when I'll be able to get online because it'll probably take mum a while to set up the computer, and as you already know I wont have extencive time online as I usually do. I hope that you're all safe I'm worried about what'll happen while I'm gone. I'll miss you all and I hope that we can talk soon in my little time slots online. I'll also be sure to keep you guys updated on whats going on.
02 May 07 2:32 am
Black_Rozez= You Should Know..
Not that many of you will care, but soon things are going to change. And they are going to become quite unstable for a while. I have been putting off telling everyone because I didn't want you guys to worry. This week I am packing up what ever items of value, I have untill sunday to sort out what means something and what means nothing at all. I cant take much really but what I do take has to be worth while everything else is getting sold or thrown out. I will then be packing up whats left of my items and I will be moving from where I live now down to my nana's place and staying with them untill the viza's pass through
[Gawd help me -____-;]
During this time of which I will most likely not be able to spend the lengthty ammount of time online that I usually did. Now I want you all to know that I will still be getting on, its not the end and yes I will miss you. I must also warn you that while I am liveing there I am not likely to be in the best of moods so you will have to forgive me if I come across as upset or angery a lot, because as you all well know my nana makes life...Difficult.
This whole change in my life has be fearful of many things. It has me worried about my friends on here and what will happen while I'm gone. It has me worried about the oppertunities that I might miss due to not being on as much. It has me scared that I might give up a lot of things I love and have had for years all for nothing if this all goes wrong. As much as I want this fresh start I am a little uncomfortable with all that is needed to go through to get there. I just have to keep thinking about the positive out come at the end I guess and just hope that everything goes smoothly.
cant really think of anything else to add right now. I'll keep you posted.
01 May 07 5:49 am
Dear Gonegothic Users
I don’t know if you guys have noticed it, but this site is incredibly quite at the moment, what is it, are people getting more picky about who they talk to in comments, I can sure as hell understand why the forums have been quite, everyone’s trying to duck and cover from all the fighting. I'd hate to think that such an awesome place like this is slowly starting to become as snobby/bitchy as Vampirefreaks. I remember a time when this was a close-knit community, the type where everyone knew everyone and everyone had a page of comments to reply to when they got online. There’s been a considerable amount of fakes suddenly joining up and half the time its made me skeptical about if a persons real or not. This site NEVER use to be like that, there never use to be an overwhelming wave of drama flooding the site and for the most part everyone respected each other.
There use to be a time when I felt incredibly safe on this site, that I could put up my thoughts and opinions that I did not have to have the best outfit or makeup [Unlike vampirefreaks where it felt like image was everything] I remember a time where I could safely speak my opinions without people finding any excuse to have a go. I've been noticing more and more that people are getting more and more picky about who they talk to, they are becoming more and more bothered about who is on their friends enemy list and why. And what pisses me off the most, if you get into a fight with one person, you have all their buddies who weren’t even evolved leaving you 1-ratings. Or in so many cases I have seen, turn around and rate someone low purely because
1. They were honest about what they thought [Difference in opinions]
2. Because they noticed that the person was on their friends enemy list
3. They get offended by something written on a persons profile.
I've never been against young baby bats joining the site, but there’s nothing I hate more then the immature ones. The ones who run around the site causing drama breaking the rules and making whiney journal entry’s. I mean yeah, we all have a rough day. We all have a bit of an issue with one user or another, but to make constant whining journal entries and to chase people into the forums and cause trouble? I mean if you find yourself blocked by someone. You should realize that chasing them into the forum and stalking their posts to batter them some more is only going to get you into trouble. If someone Blocks you TAKE THE HINT!
I guess what I'm trying to say is the people who are willing to go out and talk to everyone they can, make friends with everyone they can despite who they are and what they are into are the ones who end up with a life time of enjoyable and worthwhile friendships. The ones who wait around for people to just come to them end up alone. The ones who are forever relying on people who back them up and fight their battles will forever be weak. And those who look for trouble will find more then they bargained for. This is a community people, remember. be nice to thy neighbor!
29 Apr 07 9:57 am
Black_Rozez =OMG New Pictures!
Havent really been in the mood to take photos for a while
But I took a whole bunch tonight. I'm proud of them
I even did some photoshopped ones
Will You Please Leave Me Comments On Them?
28 Apr 07 5:40 pm
Had Enough ._.
You know what, you people act like I dont see whats going on, you act like I'm dumb and dont notice the comments. You'd think theres a reason why I block you wouldnt you? Its cause I'm sick and tired of dealing with your bullshit, but just because I've blocked you does not mean I don't see whats going on around me. I look at things you know I keep and eye on whats going on and if you say something I will find out.
And I've had enough of the childish games had enough of the snide comments behind my back you think I wont see, the journals saying you think you've won, how you think I'm weak for blocking you or not standing up to you, or that you think I'm immature or any of those other things. You think I dont see. I do you dumb shits. I'm about to let everyone see just the short of bullshit you've been saying behind my back maybe then they'll see why I have been such a bitchy user lately and why I have been getting warnings from the admins?
Ambulance_romance insists on having an on going battle with me. I blocked her ages ago because I got sick and tired of her bullshit, I got sick of her acting like she always won some argument and I got sick of her treating two of the users like crap who I am friends with. I stood up for them and before things could get too out of hand then blocked her from then on she belived that she won and that I was some weak person who just wanted to pick fights with everyone, there was journals written and arguments had and she still continues to make snide remarks in places she didn't think I would find out. She makes snide remarks in the forums then when I pull her up she tries to act like it was not aimed at me. I'm sick of the childishness.
Oh shut up whining, and stop being idealistic, life isn't all happy happy everyone get along.
Yes, not everyone would use a feature like an enemies list, but some will, in fact, alot do, and that's their choice. And anyone who's immature enough to kick off because of who's in an enemies list, you shouldn't bother with anyway.
And dav decided to add it when he was programming it, why ? Because he wanted to, adds abit more depth to it and it's an extra feature.
Ambulance_romance: darkranger,i wasnt trying to be perfect i dont seem why we have a enemies list..theres two much falling out in the world.
Black_Rozez: I agree with what you said. Very well put.
Ambulance_romance: ok,well you dont have to be nasty to me.
Black_Rozez: Excuse me. How was that directed at you in a nasty way?
I was just agreeing with what he said. If you have a problem with me thats not my issue.
I dont see how you can see me as being 'nasty' to you when I was not even talking to you in that post. I was talking to Dark Ranger.
Ambulance_romance: i didnt mean you..
Black_Rozez: and you wonder why people get angery.
If you meant dark ranger you should have replied on his post instead of the double one.
It causes less confusion that way.
Remember it for next time, Okay.
Ambulance_romance: Ok but you should read before you get into conclusions
Black_Rozez: I did read you dumb shit.
You put it on the post to me. when you should have gone directly to dark rangers post.
By posting it on mine without adding in any sort of '@dark ranger' It was directed at me. Use your brain. I know you have something against me but this is childish.
Don't think I dont see what you say in the journal comments I'm not blind.
If you have a bone to pick with me just come out and say it dont say something like that then say 'oh it was not directed at you' cause if it was directed at him you would have posted it on his.
Ambulance_romance: grow up you stupid cow,wobble your head
then when someone threatend to get an admin in she acts all fake nice and 'poor me' like
Guys. Seriously. Do we need to get an admin in here?
Black_Rozez: No thanks. That'll be my second warning in less then a week.
Guys. Seriously. Do we need to get an admin in here?
Ambulance_romance: what for?im not being nasty..im being nice to her and she doesnt like it..
babyghost wrote: Guys. Seriously. Do we need to get an admin in here?
Black_Rozez: No thanks. That'll be my second warning in less then a week.
Ambulance_romance: it shows whos at fault..
Ambulance_romance:it shows whos at fault..
-_DarkRanger_-: Just because she's been told off once this week means nothing, it doesn't effect this situation at all, and you shouldn't be so idioticly ignorant enough to insinuate such a thing just because she's been told off once this week on a unrelated incident.
Ambulance_romance: I know it doesnt mean nothing..so why go on about it..you should realise what your doing to people..probally some people hate you because of your attitude and the way you speak to people thats why people dont talk to you..and have a go at you..like you did that diary(black_rozez)so dont blame people..
-_DarkRanger_-: Why go on about it ? Well, lets have ago, shall we ? Once she'd said she'd already been in trouble once this week you said "it shows whos at fault..". So you insinuated such an idiotic thing because she's been in trouble once this week, i tell you off and then you say that it doens't mean anything and ask why go on about it... So basicly you've contracted yourself by now saying that it doens't mean anything that she's been in trouble before this week.
Some people hate me, i don't bother with them. I talk to people with respect, as long as they deserve it. Oh, and i'm afraid hun, that, people DO like me and DO talk to me and it's very rare that someone has ago at me on here as of late : )
So yer, completely destroyed your agurment there, but ah well : )
I'm thankful to -_DarkRanger_- for seeing through the bullshit and putting and end to the argueing by putting her in her place by showing her how she was contradicting herself causeing her to leave. And as much as I disslike being asked to back down and leave it I wish to thank babyghost for putting me in my place before the admins blocked me as much as I was getting provoked.
Still she did not learn her lession and of all things thought me 'jelouse of her' OMG flatter yourself much? LMFAO. Still trying to act the innocent one hmm. well by the time I'm done with this journal you wont look so innocent.
Ambulance_romance: and yeah i try to be nice to people like(black_rozez)i told her and her friend..she didnt accept it so i didnt bother..and now shes giving me greef for no reason just because i put a topic about why do we have an enemies list.. or is she jealous of me?because thats what shes showing at the moment.
Now lets move to the things she thought I'd never see hmm? I Guess I had better explain? Well, ages ago I had a fight with acidtears because I did not like the way she talked to me, so I blocked her and it was over and done with I moved on untill yesterday when I was venting in my journal about something that acidtears's sister came and had a go at me in my journal, totally un-prevoked. I ended up blocking her sister [pixie-perfect] also because I just didn't want another argument to start because I'd had enough of fighting what with the argument with razberry2k not to long ago where I was issued a warning and the small spat with chaotic_sam [and because I was tired and pissed off I exploded -___-; I ended up leaving and writeing the pissed off journal that pixie-perfect felt the need to leave the horrible comment on. When I wrote a journal defending myself she left me some comment trying to justify why she'd been horrible, but theres no justification for it in my opinion. Now she must have talked to her sister acidtears cause the next thing I know theres a journal up about me [For Fucks sake... V_V]
And look who just happends to be posting a comment thinking I wont see whats being said? This comment was posted while she was argueing with me in the forums and trying to act all innocent to anyone that would fall for it.
I've also found this while I was writing my journal:
I just wanna finish this journal off by saying I dont LIKE to fight, I dont LOOK for trouble, in fact I AVOID it by blocking. I mean for a good while I never stepped foot into the forums because I was SCARED of the arguments I'm sick of being seen as WEAK I'm sick of always being the one they tell to BACK DOWN because its not in my nature and when I DO I'm called weak. I've had enough I just want to be left alone and for this all to STOP!!!
I JUST WANT THIS ALL TO STOP
I'M SICK OF ARGUEING I'M SICK OF DEALING WITH THIS
AND I JUST WANT IT TO STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
FYI: this was my way of getting it all out of my system if you are going to bitch save it I dont wanna hear it I just want this to be over and done with so I dont have to go through this anymore. So If you're not going to say anything nice please dont, for this is my journal and my way of venting and if I get a temperary ban for it it I most likely deserve it cause I've been a terrible person.
Just stop the fighting.
28 Apr 07 5:33 am
Black_Rozez = In My Defense!
Alright. Last time I checked a journal was a place where a person can write about what they think and feel, use it as a place to express their anger and upset, or to simply get an idea across, to share a little bit of themselves with the world around them for others to read and understand what a person is going through. People may say I let people I don’t even know get to me. Well, in some ways that is correct and in some ways that is completely wrong. They are right that I do let them get to me a bit more then I should, but they are wrong when they say I do not know these people. I spend so much time talking and getting to know these people that it makes it incorrect for people to say that I do not know them. Because in a way I do, they might live on the other side of the world but I know these people.
So you think that just because you read one journal where I was clearly venting and getting past something that I am [and I quote] a whiney brat. Well, I have 2 things to say to that. Who are you to make an assumption about me from one journal entry, when you have not taken the time to get to know me and what’s more follows the opinion of someone else who takes great delight in causing other people discomfort to the point where they feel the need to delete their profile. A bully none the less. I don't care if she’s your sister. I don't care if you or her think I'm a whiney little brat, it was my journal and I defend the fact I was upset and needing to vent. If you have a problem with such I'd have thought you'd be decent enough to keep it to yourself.
Yes you can state what you like, you can have a go, but unlike all the others I'm not going to be so quick to up and delete my profile, I've been here longer then you, and this is like a second home to me where I can feel relaxed and truly comfortable, what with the exception of people like you running around thinking that you can treat anyone who shows even a speck of emotion to be less then yourself. Well guess what, you believe people like me should delete my profile? Well I belive that if anyone should delete their profile it should be you. For the simple fact, no one likes a bully. Do you think that because your sister has deleted your profile that you can take her place in being horrid? Because if that’s the case you'll quickly find yourself where your sister went. To a place where few liked her, and most people blocked her.
So I'd like to ask, next time that you see any of my journals being posted that you do me a favor and turn a blind eye, after all no one said you had to comment my journal. It is my journal and I was simply using it to make myself feel better so I didn't take it out on anyone else and I could go back to being friendly and helpful. If you don’t like the way I do things, to bad. You've not taken the time to get to know me so your opinion counts for very little. This is just me defending myself against what you said.
And I'd also like to thank God_of_Murder for standing up for me when everyone else thought it would be better to have a go. I really appreciate what you said and your efforts. You spoke the truth and put people in their place. And for that I thank you.
27 Apr 07 6:49 pm
Black_Rozez = ...
You know what, the whole lot of you guys can kiss my fucking ass. Here I am running around trying to be the nicest I can to all of you and try and help out those people that are not feeling too happy and you know what I get, I get people being complete and utter fucking assholes too me trying to pass it off as a fucking joke. You know what its not like anyone else was around to fucking do anything to help these people, so I thought I would and I end up getting called names. Not funny not fucking funny at all. Then they had the cheek to turn around and say I have this 'love me' attitude. Fuck that is it a fucking crime to try and get on with everyone. FUCKING HELL. I was just trying to be nice then have someone walk in act like it was a fucking joke, well guess what I'm not fucking laughing.You have some nerve saying that I want everyone to love me. I dont want for that I dont expect everyone to get on with me, hell I dont even care if people have something against me I do my best to fucking deal with it but I was being seriouse trying to make these people feel better and gawd damn I'm just gonna go to sleep before I get myself into the shit with the admins again. If I hadent have walked away and worked on my RPG post a little I would have carried on argueing and if I had of I would have got banned. so FUCK YOU!.....-__________-; I need a chance to cool down.
22 Apr 07 3:34 pm
Black_Rozez =Back From Trip...
Heavy Image Content - Please Let It Load!!!
Alright alright. I'm back now. And thank goodness, those days away felt like bloody forever. So I guess you wanna know what happend Hmm? Well, you'll be excited to know that not only going to tell you but I am going to share with you images and vidieos of what happends, excited yet? YOU SHOULD BE!!
First things first. The trip down there was alright it didn't feel like it took forever like it usually does. Infact it felt like it only took half the usual time. [something exciting happend. It was dark and I was looking around for boy racers in their awesome cars, well one pulled back next to us and I was hard out having a perv. Then suddenly the driver looked up and saw me looking my goodness my face must have gone bright red as I flung back into my seat. BUSTED]
And before I knew it I was back in my old stomping grounds. Nothing [and I repeat, NOTHING] had changed, it was almost as if everything had been caught in a time bubble. It would seem not even my nana had changed, she was still the woman that I had dissliked going to see except this time she took it a little too far.
This time my nana looked to me, and she said out of no where bluntly 'Your fat.' Now. I dont have much conferdence as it is, I have half destroyed myself in an attempt to have the stick figure my mother had at my age. And I was slowly begining to feel good about myself then my nana turns around and calls me fat. Now, I know how much my nana hates to be prooven wrong, so that very next morning after being rather upset about it all night I stopped her and I said. Look I'm going to show you I'm not fat and I came out in a skimpy little pink tank top, now I know for a fact I don't look fat in it. And she turned around to me and said 'you still look beefy' My god woman what the fuck do you think you're doing saying that to your grandchild!?!? Made me feel like going back to my old ways of starving the shit out of myself again. Being the respectful child I didn't speak on it again and left her to thinking that. I didn't say much to her that day.
I spent a lot of time talking with my grandfather, when he talks he speaks about a lot of things I dont know about, its sort of like a lecture I want to listen to, one where I can ask as many questions as I like and have him be pleased to tell me everything I wanna know. This time he was telling me about how easy it is to get a gun over in some places of America and he was telling me about what sort of troubles he went through with girls before he met my nana and what happend to him and all this sort of stuff I cant remember all of it off hand. But it always ends up coming back to me in bits and peices.
We left nana's and grandy's place to go and see my mums friend, I went out the back to go see her dogs, My goodness to go from having such a little dog around the house to suddenly playing with big dogs is quite a shock, I almost forgot what it felt like to be able to cuddle and play with a dog without fear of hurting or squishing it, these dogs are so loveable and they love all the attention they can get. Not shy of the camera either. Mums friend and I went down to the beach when we were waiting for our chips to cook and I took some photos of the beach.
On saturday afternoon we headed off towards town for the races I was ready for a long drive fully charged Ipod [gawd I was thankful, old bullshit listening they were] We got quarter the way out of Port Waikato when suddenly we had to go back because they'd forgotten their emergencey medication so we went back and got that they drove out towards the main city and the moter way. Poor mum looked so bord I offered to let her borrow my Ipod cause I'd put Meat Loaf, Dr. Hook and Elton John on it as well and those were off her CD's. The trip took forever to get out there and something tells me I was glad that I couldnt hear half of what was being said.
Well. You'll never guess what happend. I'd been looking forward to one thing this weekend, and one thing only. To go to the track and see the raceing, and guess what. WE GOT THERE AND THERE WAS NO ONE THERE!!?!??!? NO FUCKING RACES AT ALL!?!?!? My goodness I sat there quitely fumeing the one good thing had just been pulled out of my fingers, if nana or grandy or mum had of said anything nasty to me I would have lost it in the back seat. We ended up driveing all the way back home and I got dressed and went to bed early after eating the dinner that we got. Chicken Chow Mee.
And today we did our goodbyes to nana and grandy, I didn't really want to give nana a hug but I would have felt rude so I gave her one and I gave grandy one, and we pulled out and began to head back home, on the moter way there was nothing but old grandads and asshole drivers so I had nothing to perv on. I pretty much ended up talking to mum all the way home. When I got home we got some marinated ribs and country style chicken. Yum.
PS: SOMETHING I FORGOT TO MENTION- ON THE WAY HOME WE HAD POKINO'S GIANT ICE CREAMS!!!!!
THANKS FOR BOTHERING TO READ
19 Apr 07 12:29 pm
Black_Rozez = Wheres She Gone
[FYI: CLICK THE FLASHING CROSS FOR MORE INFO!]
I guess you're probably wondering where I'm dissapearing off too hmm, or you've come to my journal thinking you havent seen me in a couple of days? Well you'd be right. I'm going down the island for the weekend. I'm going back to the town where I use to live before I moved up here. I'm going to Port Waikato . To go and stay with my nana and grandy for the weekend. As some of you may well know I dont get on with my Nana, in fact last time I wrote a journal about going down there I was not for it at all, she always seems to find ways to piss me off or get me worked up.
But it'll be good to see my grandy again, hes really sick though, hes got infasema and hes got holes in his lungs from all the years of smokeing. We don't know how much longer he has hes begining to get worse doing silly things without reliseing because of the state hes in he cant get enough air to his brain for it to funtion normally so he does not relise. So gotta keep a close eye on him.
ANYWAY. Back to whats going on, Tomorrow I'm going to pack up a whole heap of things that my nana and grandy have offered to store when we move over to the USA like my childhood teady bears and all those little things that you just dont wanna loose. And they have some space where they can look after it for us.
Let me give you some idea of how far I'll be traveling to get down to where we are going. I live in Kawakawa
in the Bay Of Islands, and we will be going down here to Port Waikato
As you may have already guessed its ONE HELL OF A DRIVE!!! If I remember rightly its about a 5 or 6 hour drive. And we end out in a small little town thats pretty much cut off from everywhere includeing cellphone reception, thats right no phoneing or texting. BUT [you people who live in town or in land are going to love this] I end up in an amazing beautiful area like this:
You'd think I'd be in heavin right? Being in such a beautiful place? I hate to break it to you but I'm not going to enjoy it all that much for the fact that I'll be alone and it'll most likely be cold and windy. The last 2 friends that I had living there moved down to the south island of New Zealand. My worst enimie lives out there as well as a guy that I am friends with who constantly tries to get in my pants [Ew. So not inrested.] I doubt that I'll be staying home because well, that house is not for kids or teenagers theres like not much to do, I might however spend time out the back looking at their birds, see my nana and grandad do bird rescue [FYI: They take in sick and wounded birds and nurce them back to health before re-release] My nana even has a yellow crested cockatoo
We are going only for the weekend thank goodness. I am going with a fully charged Ipod filled with music, my cellphone my pen and paper and anything else that might cause amusement while I'm out there. I might even attempt to write some more of my novel if I feel in the mood. I just hope I dont leave my Harry Potter blanket behind when we leave.
There is a high point in this though, something that I always look forward to when I go out there. My nana and grandad are two of the bigest reave heads you'll ever know, they go to Waikaraka park every other weekend to go and watch the races. [Raceing runs in the family. My uncle johny use to drive a stock car. Could explain why I like to RPG street raceing *giggles*] my nana and grandy sit in the same place every time and everyone seems to know them. They've come home with countless mini flags given out to the drivers for their victory lap. They know so much about all the racers, I cant say I know all that much I just like the good looking cars that go fast and usually tell mum that my car will beat anyone she picks. Some of the cars you usually find at this are: Super Stocks, Stockcars, Super Saloons, Saloons, TQs, Sprintcars, Mini Sprints. And these guys are nuts they really go at it I've seen 2 crashes so far, and last time we went they had this HUGE fireworks display it was amazing.
So, just incase you're wondering where I am or what I'm doing and why I havent been about. I'm either in the car going down there. Bord out of my brains in the middle of no where. Or having the time of my life watching cars raceing. I'm posting this early because sometimes it takes a while for my journal's to get noticed. I leave this friday and come back monday evening. And I dont know if I'll be on much between now and when we go to leave because I'll be packing my things. So I'm getting this done now.
I'll miss you [and I hope you miss me] I want you all to stay safe and I'll tell you all about it when I get back.
17 Apr 07 11:06 am
Black_Rozez = Little Things
-When Nervous I fiddle with things
-I bite my nails and am trying to stop
-Diseny movies still make me cry
-To some extent I'm still scared of the dark
-At times I can be incridbly clumbsy and misjudge walls
-Scared of driveing, reasons being fear of crashing and getting lost
-Cant sleep without her harry potter blanket
-Does not go stay anywhere without her harry potter blanket
-Harry Potter blanket = Ultimate comfort.
-Finds it difficult to trust, but when manages keeps to it
-Secertly dreams of being a bigger writer then JK Rowling
-Gets withdrawls from the internet when away for long periods
-Deathly scared of needles, ballons
-Balloons: Had on popped behind her as a child. Fear ever since.
Needles: Had one broken in her when she was sick and sleeping as a child.
-Vast majourity of scares are on her left knee from all the years of falling over and crashing into things
-Use to call her baby dummy sucker: Pipe
-First dogs name was BJ because she couldnt say 'bear'
-Raised a baby goat and kept it as a pet
-Can touch her nose with her tounge
-Hates to be the center of attention
-Hates being ignored completely even more
-Never had good luck with relationships
-Has more guy friends then girls
-Totall cuddle whore. Addicted to attention of all kinds
-Dreams of doing a goth/emo/punk photoshoot
-Loves when partners get a -little- jellouse and possessive
-Feels less than standard when seeing better goth clothes or makeup on someone else
-She - Is - Messy!
-Has her top right ear periced - Took 3 weeks of convinceing
-Loves knee high white socks in winter
-Wishes to someday get over her fear of pain and get a black rose tattoo
-Has wished for years to have liberty spikes in her hair if only for a day
-When lonely she becomes depressed
-Her bark is worse then her bite
-But likes to bite at 'certain' times.
-Loves guys that show all emotion. Even the difficult ones like blushing and crying. I respect these men.
-Has a bad habbit of getting a crush on people she cant have
-I'm addicted to: cuddles/attention, gonegothic, gaiaonline && Messengers
Now you know some things you didn't know about me before
How about telling me little things about yourself?