04 Jul 07 10:28 am
Well, the writing you did on writing made my hairs stand on end. That was very good and surprizing. I wish women wouldn't dry up with their writing when they get out of High School, I wish women would continue their diaries, it would make them more accountable, I wish more women would be real with their damn selves so that they can become great philosophers.
I have met about 3 or 4 great female writers in my life. IN various extravagent places, and I was quite impressed with their lyrical poesy.
I know they were better then me, and I would never write as well as them, even in my peak as a writer, I have a different form of passion from a woman. Women fabricate to draw in, I just don't give a damn, You either come to me or you are left out in the cold it is your choice.
I think everyone can potentially write, and the more you write the better you get at it, but I think the thing that makes a writer
is someone who has shoulders to hold up a head to stun an audience with a tongue from what they see with their eyes and make it commonplace observation with a new twist which ever way the diamond eye of the conversation turns, the rainbow of colors bursting out gives birth to butterflies.
I think you comment about characters coming to life was an excellent undersite I sometimes forget I have the power of doing myself. I cannot create characters on my own I always suck life force from existing peoples, that is my gift.
03 Jul 07 4:49 am
blossoming flowers of evil
The thing that makes Churches holy ground is that initially there was a cemetery under them. I can see with my eyes closed now, and if I put up my hands in front of closed lids I can see what is under the church. St Mary's church here in Hunter's Point had quite a few bodies stuck under grill gates in coffins. That was such a clear vision. I saw a cemetery in Coney Island, a large one and there was two towers burning, two dark towers. I saw the Verazano Bridge and there was a white light over it, and
back at Saint Mary's last Thursday I woke up with no sanctuary and completely drained, and with no thighs no eyes, and no lower legs, I went where one of my protectors sits in the south west corner of teh church. Obviously there was a very powerful person buried under there, someone not damned, some one restng in peace in heaven. There was a bench to the left that rocked, I put my left foot on it and then I just sat there and absorbed the dead person's energy, it had to be a saint of some kind. There are many saints alive today, you have to be dead to be a saint, but there are good people who just be do and are, and they don't deal with lepers in India for attention, or whatever, some of you may be Saints.
I went to a bar this evening and I told these stories to J.D. I said look I will sense energy in here. Then I looked at the wall over his right shoulder and I saw the brightest light that I had ever seen since last Thursday or Wednesday when I realized I had these powers. There were 3 sisters behind the wall, all growing up. I know one of their names, they are all blonde and they always smile when I walk by, and I would walk through fire to protect them. I was blinded by their energy, it was amazing. You had to be there.
Also a documentary movie maker brought an 11 year old into my apartment, she sucked me dry, I was whole better than I had ever been and then the next day I was nothing but a wraith. Obviously the prepubescent girls have the highest energy. You have to stay away from them if you are trying to get out of hell, they will kill you, suck all the good right out of you. I guess, if I was to analyze it, they are blossoming sexual creatures so they steal mojos in order to be more feminine and gain the libido. I believe my hunch has some veracity.
03 Jul 07 1:20 am
Shiny Girls post
Shawn I crossed over, here is what I did. I sinned right somehow. I know you couldn't tell me, because the ones who are allowed to make the cut are the just, anmd this is something that one has to be guided by their own devices. The psychic told me how to approach the final test. There are other like me, and they don't know what to do.
They will not find the answer here, but the ones reading will understanbd what to say to guide them. PLease keep this up. Thanks and say hello to the girls, I love them because I know them. I think my subsrciption runs out on the 19th of December, try to schedule a web cam chat before then.
MS is auto immune thing
I had MS presursor, but the body stopped attacking itself when I flip flopped so that the body parts that were not a part of me became a part of me, when the immune system crossed over too.
I cured MS by preventing it
There is no cure for MS as of now
once you have it, you cna never get rid of it
I didn't know how I was going to do it, but I did
you see icons are icons because of individuality, the ability to think freely and being different in a world where everyone is out to get someone, the only ones who can make the transition and receive the godhead are the ones when at the cross roads, they make the right choice
the right choice is thus
do you do the wrong thing at the wrong time, and this makes it right?
or do you do the right thing at the right time?
The right thing would be that the individual considered for judgment by nature makes the decision whether they will cover their own butts, or whether they are going to take a chance, that their passion, to not live in a compromised form?
When in life radicality is the thing that drives the present into the future and all innovation invention and discovery is found by taking the chance by smiting the self, and being diffrent from the others who only care about themselves, when the sacrifice of the body is made, nature rewards the individual with longer life.
The immortality of fame is bestowed upon the ones who have the courage to go against the self, to constantly do things that are not allowed, to break barriers, to dare to be different, to always make the wrong choice and be experimentative. I have always made the unique choice to go against the grain that other would naturally do. I am not human I never was, I had the power to smite the self and see if I would survive. This time I just wanted out, the game was not fair, and I gave up, I did not do the thing that would have preserved the self, as evil would have done, and therefore at the time of judgment, evil does make the wrong choice, self preservation goes against the community, I can and did have the power and strength to err, I have always been candid, for in erring one is human, and the truth is found by being daring. The seeker of truth finds it, when he does not like it and he wants to die because he cannot stand in judgment, he gives up at the moment it counts the most, and he chooses oblivion instead of self preservation, and this made all the difference in the world to always take the path least travelled.
I will not live for ever, but because I understand things as only a strong spirit can dare to go, to receive the collective unconscious from the truth of the reality of life is the greatest gift.
To be taught things is to never learn. In order to learn one must feel it. One must walk through fire, fear, insecurity, self preservation are for ordinary people, they will all not pass the test. Fear is worse than all, fear will drive one mad, fearing makes them come true.
I fused my left brain into my right, and the interface is clean. However I must be balkanced right now I am fragile, annd i had to show up at a basketball game to be available for the playoffs, and I awoke maybe before I was ready, but I awoke with a start so I may have cut it right, I did some mathematics, and I was satisfied. But fear, as the formication happens, is imperative, while the whole brain is rewired to wrok with the brain chemicals as they were meant to as when I first came out for the first 33 years of my life, the feeling of ants crawling up my body, I let into my brain, and I was open to it. I did not have fear or paranoia when it happened. Then as the third eye, window to the soul opened, and I had the third chance to rewire my brain right, as the left brain downloaded into the right, I hypnotised myself to have the prime directives I wished to guide me.
I said 1) I am a teacher, I am a teacher, I am a teacher
2) respect children
Now, when all those voices of my left brain united with my right, they are ordered and my priorities are clear. It was cool. I was thinking about something, and i heard an echo in the back of my head say, almost audible, "I am a teacher".
I knew I had to brain wash myself, because I knew what was happening
it is not the eyes are the window of the soul, it is the third eye right between the eyes, which is the center of the gemini, it is the Agna chakra point. it is the chakra point that most people have fear when it happens, I controlled the fear, I had no fear, and so my brain has been rewired right.
I am also playing the guitar again to keep it simple stupid
obsessing about things leads to madness, it drains the brain rather than filling it, I am eating berries for dopamine, turkey for seratonin, I am going to my old shrink that dismissed me so long ago "if you are not crazy and you don't need medicine why do we meet once a month?"
Yeah doc, you are right, but if I ever need you or if I learn about something I wish to teach you I will contact hyou again
my door is always open she said
The doctor took my blood pressure today, and I think I already told you it was perfect, and he said I was manic, well, I opened up to him to show him where my mind was at all the things I was considering, how to get norepinephren and epinophrine, and not take other neuroleptics that put pepople on couches and make them get diabetes and gain 50 pounds.
he was angry, I told him look, I am not going to go mad, I know how madness works, it is a brain imbalance, I have no fears, I am secure, and I am playing guitar to not think so much
and he looked at me so proud
I took control of my life
The psychic I visted and paid 35 dollars for when I got off the train from Rhode Island
she spoke in generalities, she said that I pretend to be happy and that I could live better but I have a wall I hide behind
she said you must remove the block and be more free
I was like no, you are wrong I am the most free person I have ever met
she said no, you place limitations on your self, because you think you are ill, it is manifest destiny where the right mental approach is the correct philosphy. The philosophy of how an individual approaches life is what drives it to their destiny, it is the most important thing.
All these years you think you have been sick, you think I can't do this and then you can't. you must remove the block
and so I went around after that and lived hard and strong, and this made a difference in this 7 day test of further judgment where I have to keep at the world and onlyh fall asleep when it is absolutely necessary, to sleep before the time comes, then I lose, I have removed the blockj and I am following life diligently and answering all life's responsible rythms. Mental health I used to teach my kids when I thought I knew it all, is to go out and do and face life's problems. Life's problems infest your mind when you let things build up, and then you are trapped paralized, and overwhelmed.
That 35 dollars was the best thing I could have thrown my money on, as I left I thought I should have been the one to give her a reading, but, you cannot tell people how to make the right choice at the crossroads, thenit is not their choice and the benfits are lost, judgemnt by widom of intuition is the key, to be natural and to do unconsciously without thinking the right thing always which turns out to be the wrong thing,
when I keep doing the wrong thing at the right time, then that is me, and that is the thing that has always guided me, exceptionality in life is most rare, and when the individuakl cxeases to care abiut themself, that is the mark of a good man, and nature wants to keep the altruistic around, evil dies. Earth wants to live, the good whom undertake evil to understand evil to defeat evil, when they are a spy in the house of evil, they are at the bridge of lies, the crossroads of the devil, when they choose the wrong path for them, then they have made the right choice.
Life has always been backwards because of the devil = lived, backwards, the devil has altered life because of the worng done to children we will never overcome, so when all good deeds get punished because people envy care most of all, and evil wins because the devil recruits people to be evil like him and to stop to care about others,
ultimately life is a rehearsal, and when the time of judgment comes because the angel left shoulder and devil right, the angel has left so you want to leave life, life is totally fake and even if the devil appears right, you know that truth is a lie and the lies are truth, and so I went the other way away from life and I was rewarded. In peace.
It was amazing Kristen, I kmnow it sounds crazy, but I have always been candid.
Posted by Vampariah on Thursday, November 30, 2006 at 10:30 PM
30 Jun 07 6:33 am
Actually, in order to prevent cataracts in the eyes, the birth defect, one has to look at all compass points N>E>W>S>
and focus on a light until the light goes away in your eyes, that is the moment when one hemisphere drowns it out, and the other takes over, then for a moment there is a union between the two and you got stereoscopic vision.
You also have to face North East.
So I was on the Greenpoint bridge looking at the moon, showing the backs of my hands to the moon face, dust like how I created a dust storm doing that trick with the sun, you see the sun is more powerful....
and what happened ? You had to be there... tingely feelings, was a sdign to move on, I reattached my retina in 5 easy steps. Now I can make more kids than just the girls and boy as before, I made a mistake to make one more boy, so that is up to 6, and then I was able to make 10 females, and then by stealing the Y chromosome from my father, by sleeping in his bedm where I used to sleep, and soulamte slept, I got her energy in me, I switched directions and got feet soul in my head, I put my head in 7 years of sleeping tummy, and though I almost died, 3 times, I came back stronger, much stronger.
Now I think I have to lie down on my stomach, then flip over. Maybe do that a couple of times. A girl had a studded belt around her jeaned ass, she made my Zebra Leno head tingle, I wanted to dip her in chocolate sauce over and over again, but fortunately she left the room, because the pool stick in my hands was beginning to grow obscenely.
Yeah anyways, so I looked at the lights for a long time, and then I looked away, on the bridge, and I saw first one of the evil empire ships X wings fly by spinning in a spiral, which was just a shadow of what I had seen. I think it rolled to the right.
Then I saw Han Solo's millenium falcon, wow, typing in SOLO made my fingers tingle I guess I better go
Did someone say Darth MILKY WAY ?
30 Jun 07 6:16 am
LOST IN THE VILLAGE
Magic ? I am a goat killer, I played the flute to rise the Y of Dad, to save my life. I sang and my throat was a double bass stand up for I was a twin oak as a womans T shirt read.
I went to Washington Square Park, and I stepped out of bounds and my thoat got dry, I turned back and the people made me find the right Global POsition to bring back one of my legs. The day before I lost my feet, I lost my calves I lost my thighs, and then my hands started to go, and all I was was like the torso that MIchelangelo did not finish, but the head was up there, oh so empty that it was, for my feet and up to my thingy was dead again, and then I brought it back.
I walked around the city with my eyes closed I could see through the lids, I got to the corner where Bob Dylan sat and playing guitar for the forst time when he came to NYC, there was something over there, some kind of strong signal and then when I crossed the street and looked around with my eyes closed I saw a black drfagon where I had been. I walked into the dragon and then I turned around, and I saw a pegasus there where dylan had been.
The energy signals are from where alot of people walk, when you walk in the center of a sidewalk you collect energy from two sides, and they hip hop into you like an arch, energy from others.
That is all. There is more, but it is not an exact science, but if you don't learn all the rules, and if ytou don't have a whole neighb orhood, or a whole website out to save you, then you don't have a chance.
I heard the second blonde boy is the one. I am to mate with a short blonde girl, that is the deal.
26 Jun 07 7:16 am
Christmas in June
Yes I have been making alot of good points lately, I am a dumbass. But tonight I turn over a new leaf. For once I am going to listen to my heart. I am going to listen to the Chinese construction workers who went out of their way to lay down the pink duct tape with the hole in it. The symbolism was not lost on me. I want the pink Chinese duct tape spool, and I trust in the lessons of China through the silent voice of Pentacostal Holy Ghostism.
Actually, there is a mind virus inside of me, and my writing is more a deliverence of the old subliminal which you guys have been trying to teach me. Tanks but no tanks. Redemption is up to the individual. The postulator who called me a dumbass may not understand what people are up against, or people rising from hell, or China, the other side of the earth from Kansas. You can't tell people how to do it, we must learn from our mistakes.
In december I had a vision of a person walking in the dark coming across a fire pit. A person rose from the fire pit. That was a long time ago. In the wee hours of yesterday I had the same vision, I came up to the hell fire, and a man who looked like the silver surfer rose from out of hell, the camera angle shifted slightly, and this time he threw a hook shot like Kareem Abdul Jabbar to the right of the vision screen, and then hell was below him. I want to play basketball, I have no more calves to sprain, I don't know how many magical balls of paper I have to rim in the garbage basket outside the doors of hell fire. Thsi is my last piece of paper I throw.
Does this sound silly? Does it sound like I am a dumbass? Yes it does, but it is the voice of wisdom, a man who has learned from his mistakes. The visions are real, and they are the visions that people have who leave hell, all of us have the same vision, the same first vision from the one who first rose from hell and created heaven, if it were not the case then how did that vision get in all our heads of the silver surfers?
I would rather be a dumbass than a dead ass. I don't mind the criitique, because people who think I write crap have no clue what to do in life.
Never once do I sit here and compose anything, I go with what I feel at the moment, you aught give it a try, just let the writing take you away, let the wisdom speak the ages. I have faith that the Holy Ghost will carry me far. The stranger in the mirror is me. I am not the same man I used to be. I would have thought this writing to be dumbass also back yonder. But now I know you are all my only friends. My drug dealer friend came bu and tried to entice me to go to a strip club tonight. He is the dumbass. Magick can sometimes backfire.
Death is a drug made just for life, so people play the game. Death uses us to fabric society. LIfe tends to stare at the magnificence of a body that won't die and refuses to live.
25 Jun 07 9:49 pm
Hendrix the fisherman
You aught check out the Vampariah blog too, I hear that guys tells all his secrets.
Um I walked the horse path to get to the lake, because I knew there was some tunnels near the 77th entrance where I had a dream I met Jimi Hendrix, I saved his ass, and then we went into the subway tunnels that feed the Museum of Natural History, and we met god down there and we walked the tunnels together, and then a train came and god said trust me and you won't be hit by the train. Jimi said yeah man that is groovy, so god holds up his cloak and Jimi is shielded, but the train kills both god and Hendrix.
I willtell the story of what I said to the kids in the dark when I found them at the lake being told about vampire bats. A fish jumped out of the water, and they told me to shut up, and I told them to get the cops, leave me the fuck alone, and don't tell me what to do. Then in my flip flops I jumped over glacial rock and slammed down, I turned and looked behind them, spat my cigarette out and said:
Then I put another butt in my mouth and breathed in frustration.
They shouldn't have kids in the park at night, the Brambles are filled with gay guys in chaps with come hither looks on park benches. I tripped on shrooms by them two nights one with the Grafitti Posse, and the former with Teenage Wasteland Gang. Now the children will think twice about going into the park after dark, because of vampires.
25 Jun 07 4:59 am
Last night, I was supposed to flip over in bed, and I didn't know what to do, but an owl c ame from out of nowhere, and kept making 4 hoots, until I realized that the owl, is the all seeing eye of the Masonic system that protects america, and England. I listened to the owl, flipped over and then the owl hooted once only a couple of times. The owl was a watcher, their eyes never close so they are the eyes of god, as the beings we came from did not have to blink and blinking is a tick.
Alot more shit has happened since just yesterday, and it seems have learned the last healing trick, so with the knowledge as long as one is standing, even with one foot in hell, or both feet again, knowing the rules, one can redeem themself. It is not necessary to escape hell, in hell you can live for ever but to make perfect children, once has to leave hell whole, and then get on with their life. However the moment that yoou are reborn you lose the powers of hell to stay alive forever. Nomadic existences are possible in this day and age if you have the money to do so. If I had been wiser, in that trying to make a buck, and published my books long ago, I could have bolted this town and gone west as a drifter, with money, just stopping at ATMs, and doing Fung Shwai outdoors until the end of time.
But now since I don't have the money I have to stay here, escape hell, become whole and a family man.
When I was teaching in my second to last job in a school by Yankee Stadium, there was a tall black boy whom I would write stroies for while I would be on guard for the boy's locker room. It was an on going story of a male character whom travelled the world as a drifter, and would stay with a woman until she would ask after making love, what is wrong what are you so distressed about, all you do is look out the window.
The male character says, I cannot tell you, and if you bring it up again, I will have to leave you. Of course the women want to know what the man is thinking, and so he leaves her. The stories went on, after many installments, until the main character, which was me, meets a girl whom he is having the affair with in some inland town in the USA.
She comes to him and tells him she is pregnant, and then he finally settles down.
Apparently today is the day of my rebirth, I died twice more today, but I pulled myself back using different tricks. I wonder if you know them. The amount of realignment of the genes in my body were very well put together, and the sin that almost killed me was very mild. On hell mouth border, one can step out of bounds, and quickly have a heart attack. All I have now is a pain im my liver, but I can heal that 4 different ways, just different counts for the Reiki technique counts. The numbers cannot go above 69, for 70 apparently causes cancer.
The reason why the amount of time people couod do something was 24, 20 40 30 18 or 17 or less was because, it was a far shot away from the ultimate quantity of the times you could do a move. In order to heal something for a quick fix, 18 will work out fine, but you have to conserve moves, and this is why the subliminal tells you to only do 18 or whatever. The crab holds can be held for 2 minutes in the beginning, but the angle of the crescent will change in the end and you can parlay the energy a lot longer than the two minutes. There is the rule of fear, a twinge in the body that makes you think something you just did is bad, the stomach will also burp and shit make weird sounds and then you release the hand holds, but what I learned tonight is you can do more than you think. We ingrain rules and are limited by fears. I am OK. Tomorrow I am 16 again -2.
24 Jun 07 7:48 pm
LAST COFFEE in Cavalry
Aparently doing the wrong thing is the only thing that saves you, so thereby facing death is the only way to live. I can attest to that, but there is a limit to how much stupidity the Grim Reaper allows, if you don't want to be here, it can be arranged, even the angel of death has designs on your soul, and it is in your darkest hours, wallking with your head hung low, you can almost see a halo in your soul in the hole in your shadow, and the wind comes over your right shoulder when you take control of your passions, then when passions overwhelm and you stare at her belt too long the wind comes over our left shoulder. Then you realise the peope you told off were the ones whom had a clue to save you, but you sent them away because only the future knows what to do, but when you get to the future you know what to do, because they are not with you, and the guilt for their silence you feel, and everything is capitalized in your head. MOCHA COFFEE w/ whip cream. *sip*
24 Jun 07 10:43 am
why there are pyramids
The immortal would die on the highest peak of Earth, there is a limit to how many different tricks magick can bring, and there is a limit to how many times you can come back from the dead. Just in the past 6 months I have been in 5 different bodies. Last night I did the wrong thing again, and what should have killed me touched me in places that I know put my mind into my feet. I felt a mosquito on my neck that I knew was not there, I felt it cross my floating collar bone like a cat, making love to itself with it's paws being licked. But every rose has a thorn, they save the best for last, could you figure out the trip?
There are god makers I can't tell you how to escape death, I didn't make a cheat sheet, I just wanted to go to hell, the rest of you need people in high places. But when the god makers make you a god, then it is time to make Gods, for what did we flirt with disaster for? Gambling with our lives is the fun there is. I have been told that you can escape death as Ziggy says, just leave the constraints, but that is how bums are made. I talked to a bum on church steps whom gave me a clue he said he was on the street when his mom died, then he got up and I saw the back of his thighs and they were eaten up by something. His mother was gone in him. I knew where to receive the message in all of Manhattan, the bum was there, he taught me what the rest of the world could not, and it was a crucial ingredient to the lack of repitition in deke-ing death, it just can't be done, there are only so many moves, and no one is immortal.
The pyramids of the Egyptians were not for the immortality of the Pharaohs, it was for the immortality of his people. They climbed up the pyramids black men and came down white on the other side. Some failed lived and roamed, and learned the laws of death, to cheat death, to not sleep in the same place twice, but then you are a vampire for ever.