My mother got an inheritance last year, and my step father paid off his mortgage with it, and bought a brand new car, so my mother couldn't give me the hundred dollars she normally gives me. So I got a sweater I didn't fit in, some bathing essentials, toiletries; my father probably will forget to give me some money too, and my Aunt will forget also. When you ask people if they want a sweater for Christmas and they say no, it is because they don't want to feel guilty for getting something and not have given you a farthing. So anyways, I went to buy sweaters at OLD NAVY because they were 15 dollars, and I had some extra money because all my bartenders didn't make me pay for a drink all week leading up to Christmas (and I drink everyday - because for ten years I couldn't drink haven been sick from hitting my taint and receiving a nerve problem) So when I got reborn and was no longer ill, I said to myself, I am going to make up for lost time and drink. Which leads me to the next present. A bartender of mine from Morocco, named Salma, she ordered something off the internet a long time ago for Christmas, and gave it to me on Friday night. It was a pint beer mug with my nickname etched on stainless steel COACH. The bar manager said it would be alright if I was the only customer to have his own glass, and all the bartenders think it is a great idea. I don't know where they are going to store the glass.

Anyways, so I went to OLD NAVY the day before XMAS, and with an hour before they closed I headed for the sweaters, and I saw this line for the cash registers that had no end, so I just turned around and walked out of the store, not getting the people I love sweaters. The sweaters I saw were cheap anyways. A total loss, but on the way home I got some Jamaican spiced rum for the night, and a cute bottle of Chablis for my mom who is Finnish and loves drinking.

I don't know about this Facebook thing, I told all my friends where I would be on Christmas Eve, and no one showed up, so I worked the bar and hit the jutebox, not sticking around for my buy back, since I had drunk the flask of rum before heading in there. I can talk to fish, and am very supernatural, so I pretty much sat by the fish tank and interpreted their fin action for words, in between conversations with people I knew who came into the local bar. I will go to the same bar tonight, and I am sure the night will be pretty much the same, except tonight I get to drink my beer instead of the rum. I couldn't drink beer because I was going to my mother's house for Christmas, and I would take a long car ride to get there and beer makes me have flatulence. And I am not one of those people who like to fart in front of people, so, the rums and cokes I had all night didn't let me go to sleep, and then my brother woke me up early to drive out on Long Island to my mother's, and so I figured if I rubbed one out I might be able to get to sleep, but it ended up being 9:30 AM when I finished my personal sex session and he woke me up at 11:00 AM. This is bad news.

You see when one gets reborn, they can have sex once a day and no more, and in between sexual sessions one needs six hours of sleep, otherwise you lose your hair. So I just tried to sleep when I got home from XMAS at my mother's and tried to get some sleep, but I couldn't and you need to get into REM sleep to rejuvenate the body, dreaming makes the body regenerate. So basically for Christmas I lose some hair, because definitely I am going to rub one out tonight. The reason is because after I hit my taint in '97 I couldn't have sex for 11 years, I did have it, but hitting the taint breaks the male member, and when you do use that body part when it is broken you have neurological trouble, like blindness and auto immune disorder. But I am a sexual person, so I kept doing the magick, and I thought I was going to die, so now I have sex whenever I want, sticking to the once a day rule, since I couldn't have sex for 11 years.

But I already said goodbye to my hair not to long ago, since it is good for the heart to have sex, and if you don't use it you lose it, and it is more important to have a strong heart beating in one's chest than having hair on one's crown of the head. Anyways, I figure once I lose my hair women might select me for union because, I was always the type of guy, who could walk into any bar and sweet talk some girl and score. But because I had that power no woman could trust me, and women want men who are faithful to them as much as men want the same thing from women. So, too bad my hair is gold, but it was a present I couldn't open, so once I am no longer beautiful then, I might find love. I think it was the Miller's tale in the Cantebury Tales by Chaucer that told of a man that found a witch, who told the Miller that, she could transform herself into a beautiful woman or one that would be true to him, and he chose the beautiful woman, and she wasn't true to him, so he wasn't happy. This is how it is my friend. Beautiful women have a power, and so do men, and absolute power corrupts absolutely. One must lose the power to glean from it.

That is enough for now, just to add, that if I do lose my hair and a woman chooses me to make a child I probably will make a girl baby, so tonight I say goodbye to sons. Goodnight.