My old man has some nerve talking shit about his own daughter dropping out of the navy because she had a kid. He went AWOL when he was in the army. And my uncle made it very clear that my pops is to blame for their family being torn apart, and for what? All because my grandpa was a hard ass on him a few times and my grandma was religious. I haven't seen my uncle, aunt or grandma in over a decade and they barely know me and my sister because my dad didn't want us associating with them. I haven't seen gramps since 2008 I believe, which bring me to the next part, my grandpa's funeral. My aunt changed his funeral date and told no one all because my dad was threatening to do who knows what to everyone who happened to be at the funeral. The real fucked up part is that he's making my aunt and uncle out to be greedy and telling me that they took the money that their father left behind. It's like, "Dude, they didn't take anything that was entitled to you because there wasn't even a will. And wanting money he left behind even though you hated him is just plain fucked up." According to my uncle he'd rather have his dad back than have any money or property he left behind. As for that property that my dad supposedly inherited and wants to sign over to me, I don't want it, I have no right to it being that I barely even knew my grandpa. Man, all this just because my dad can't get over shit that happened 30+ years ago.

The 1996 Romeo & Juliet

One of my cousins asked why I don't have kids. I told her because I don't want my family trying to convince me to raise the kid with Catholic beliefs.

I sometimes hate not knowing what's going to go on in the few hours that are to come.

I really fucked things up with her.

I wanna be close with my old man, but being around him is like being around an angst ridden teenager talking shit about everyone and everything... and I've had enough of people over the age of 18 with teenage attitudes after I broke up with my most recent girlfriend.

The funny thing is that no one has ever disappointed me more than those 2 people.

Fuck it, I'm just gonna get drunk next chance I get... most likely on New Years eve.

I guess my father is just going to be perpetually cynical... he talks shit about everyone and everything like no one and nothing is good.

I kinda want to go out and prance around in the rain.

This job doesn't suck, but I hate not having more hours or days. I just want this 90 day probation period to be over already.

I'm worried that she (Michelle) doesn't give a damn about me anymore.

I met pornstar Molly Bennett.

I have to admit that even with this job I'm not happy... relieved, but not happy, and it's not because I don't like this job. Maybe I'm just not a happy person anymore.

I wonder what happened to DarkStarlings. Did someone pull the plug on that site?

I wish things would be the way they were before 2011, when I wasn't alone 70% of the time and Melissa was still around... or at least as smooth as they were in February, when I at least had someone to talk to late at night.

It's been a few days over 5 years and I still haven't wanked.

Girls Girls Girls - Mötley Crüe

God, I'm so not used to lying to people.