I'm about done with these classes. I'm sick, absolutely sick, of the same old shit.

Today I'm torn between going to my friend's birthday party and my 2 nieces' birthday party.

The ring?

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh this is crazy. I have a guy that loves me more than anything and I condemned him for being scared and making an honest mistake? I think I'm more fucked in the head than I thought I was.

Women don't take risks and love is the greatest risk of them all, you just want a guy that you can feel safe with. What a woman has to realize is that if a woman punishes a man, it is only to change his behavior. Then he can be accepted into your life.

You know... I can't be mad at you for making assumptions because I was a bit vague in my post but you've got it all wrong here.

I am always wrong with you.

Not always but the majority of the time, yes.

My anxiety is in overdrive. Still haven't found a compatible medication for other things. Still trying to figure out about 30 different things. Still behind on school work because I cannot focus because of everything else going on. I'm fighting not to break down but I think I need to just so that I can start over.

My mom is in the hospital again. She's not been home since she left it on October 26th. Between hospitals, nursing homes, and rehabilitation centers, she's bedridden and not being taken care of properly. Now she has another infection which triggered a massive round of vomiting which might have triggered her blood pressure going so low that it wasn't registering. Or it could have gotten so low due to the hole in her heart. No freaking clue yet. The ER didn't know what was going on so they sent her to Cleveland for further testing. She's a "specialized case" as the local ER doctors told her and they'd rather send her on up to Cleveland than even try anything. She was supposed to have a skin graft today to cover up the spot that keeps getting cut open from all of her surgeries but that now has an infection in it because her colostomy bag wasn't changed and the area cleaned properly. Add to that a fistula that appeared and leaked feces directly into her body. This lady cannot catch a break. And all she's worried about is getting her PT while she's in there so that she doesn't lose any progress she's made as she was finally able to get from her bed to her wheelchair and back on her own.

On top of this, my school fucked me over and they want money they say I have to pay despite the loans and whatnot being more than enough. And if I don't pay then they'll deny me access to my classes, preventing me from being able to finish them and therefore graduating.

My own health is shit.

School is almost out for my kids so that's another load of stress I'm not ready to deal with.

Too damned much going on. Time to suck it up and hide it all away again.

That is like the worst status update I have ever heard.

you put the "king" in sneaking...

I knew you couldn't relate to that.

I had a bunch of people give me compliments on my hair last night, this one guy who I thought was straight would be talking to me, and then he'd stop talking look up at my hair and then smile. It was perverse. They said I looked like teen wolf.

don't be a mental patient.

You aren't crazy

It's been two years since we were together, i don't know why i'm still thinking of you.

You are no whore.

They are just jealous of you.

Could use a drink right about now.