Sick of This Stupid Girl Suit.
The thousands of reasons Sakky hates humanity, including herself.

Ah fucking hell.

Okay brief update since i've not been on, gotta remind myself where my life's at.
Uhm..
18/4/14-2:44pm
I am single.
I am not dead.
I am working at that bar, where simba is, with my homeboys in the kitchen.
Got exams soon.
Tired of therapy.

My "friends" suck.

So this girl sent me hate on ask.
My other "friend" messaged the page i admin last night and i was MIGHTILY pissed.
"Listen to the Living" is me unless it's stated that Oli is posting.

Kerry Denham

Um, tis DigitalInsanity here, whoever currently has manager authority did you remove me as admin?
Kerry Denham
'bout 8 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Kerry Denham

It wasn't a mistake either. My name's been removed from the admin list. I was also told a few nights ago despite issues between me and another admin, I wouldn't be removed. I don't mind if you guys don't want me here, but the page means a lot to me and I'd like to come back.
Cheers.
Kerry Denham
'bout 8 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Kerry Denham

Also the only two people who have manager are Shannon and Oli. So it was one of the two of you and to be honest I can guess which one. I was told I would not be removed so and explanation would be fucking wonderful,

I'm also fully aware that someone is seeing these are ignoring them. Whoever it was at least have the courage to be honest.

*and
Kerry Denham
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Kerry Denham

Wow. I saw what was said. That's fairly low. Considering only part of it was my blame. I'll still post from my personal because those fucking people mean a lot to me and neither one of you can change that.
Listen to the Living
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Listen to the Living

So i just checked the page, saw all this crap. Has anyone actually been replying to Kerry at all or is she talking to herself again? Like i said to you MYSELF, i didn't delete you. Just grow up already. ~S.
Kerry Denham
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Kerry Denham

I said I thought I knew who it was. I did guess right because I guessed it was Oli. No, they haven't replied because they're too fucking cowardly. No I won't grow up, I'm fucking great like this thanks.
Listen to the Living
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Listen to the Living

Cowardly.. you have no damn right to talk about cowardly. Why can't you just message Oli on his personal? You expect anyone here to back you up? Most of them won't take sides.. which is perfectly fine but the ones who HAVE chosen to take a side, have chosen mine. You won't win any wars here Kerry. Just message his personal. You KNEW there were only two other managers.. you managed to message MY personal, surely you could message his. Your logic is bloody ridiculous and if you're fucking great how you are? How come your arms are a fucking mess and you feel the need to show me them every bloody time? Calling me a shit friend Kerry? I HELPED YOU WASH THE BLOOD OFF YOUR FUCKING CUTS CAUSE YOU COULDNT DO IT ALONE. And yes, i'm saying all this here, because maybe next time you decide to go off and be a two faced, hypocrite then i will have witnesses. Just fucking go away.
Listen to the Living
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Listen to the Living

~Sakky btw for anyone wondering.
Kerry Denham
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Kerry Denham

Wow. Okay that made me laugh.
Goodnight.
Listen to the Living
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Listen to the Living

Can't even fucking reply. Pathetic bitch.
Kerry Denham
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Kerry Denham

Because I'm done trying to explain myself to you. You hear what you want to hear. Oh and what I meant was I'm perfectly find not growing up. Oh and my cuts are nothing to do with anyone else so don't drag them into the conversation because it's private.
Listen to the Living
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Listen to the Living

You can't even respond to the points i make though. Why not message Oli's personal? Nice way of skirting around the whole "Sakky is a supportive friend" thing. Well done ;D You get a fucking sticker. And as for not dragging things into the conversation, try remember that when you get mad at me in one of your little bitch fits and bring up every bloody bad thing i ever did. Just GO AWAY Kerry. You arent wanted here, so get over it.
Listen to the Living
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Listen to the Living

Someone block this bitch from the page please?
Kerry Denham
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Kerry Denham

Wow, I never brought up ever single thing you fucking did but now I will. Did you all know that Shannon has bitched about most of you to me. It's quite funny.

Go ahead and block me. I'm done with you are all your attention grabbing bullshit. And if you start on me again tomorrow I'll do worse than fucking kick you.
Listen to the Living
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Listen to the Living

Oh have i? Really? :') Funny lets go through everyone shall we? Mia- no i havent. Mariah- no i haven't. Seanny hurt me a lot so yes, i probably did and he knows that. Oli- i havent. Caroline- no i haven't. What exactly have i said about thse people Kerry, hmm? You do realise you went up to my best friend the other day and decided to rant about me? You really think Sam wouldnt tell me that? And then you claim you arent two-faced. You are twofaced and a bloody idiot because you wne to my best friend to insult me.

Listen to the Living
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Listen to the Living

*went.
Kerry Denham
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Kerry Denham

I knew Sam would tell you, but I didn't really have a problem with it. Your opinion of what I think of you doesn't even bother me, and your attempt at insulting me, it's just making me laugh. Goodnight Shannon.
Oh and to all the other admins, really fucking sorry you had to witness that. Keep your chins up.
Listen to the Living
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Listen to the Living

...oh look. I just got ignored. I havent bitched about everyone here to you.. lying little sket. Jesus sort yourself the fuck out.

And making you laugh? ..i know you're sitting there either crying your eyes out or shaking with rage and for once im glad cause you fucking deserve to be.
Kerry Denham
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Kerry Denham

Actually, you've said things about Mia, Oli and Caroline before. Oh and crying my eyes out and shaking with rage. Sure. Looks like it doesn't it.
image_1366755312638945.jpg
Listen to the Living
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Listen to the Living

What have i said about any of them thats bad? What have i said? Go on fucking tell me :')
Listen to the Living
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Listen to the Living

Obey here's a good shitstorm.
Kerry dont go fucking whining because YOU used ask.fm hiding behind anonymous to insult Sakky, welcome to pissing Oli off. I saw that and got pissed off, Sakky's upset because of you, she did not ask me to remove you, I did because Sakky put me in charge you two faced bitch, grow up and fick off because I can't be dealing seeing your fucking name everywhere. Bye
-Oli
Listen to the Living
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Listen to the Living

Mah homeboy. ^ ~S
Kerry Denham
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Kerry Denham

You told me you though Oli was Whiny and over the top because of his heart problems, which is something he can't help. You said Mia never posted anything useful, and as for Carline my mistake, you hadn't. I didn't send her anon hate Oli and you can get that traced by the fucking police if you want. Goodnight assholes.
Listen to the Living
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Listen to the Living

Also Kerry, if you wish to discuss this further, message my personal. I accept full responsibility - Oli
Kerry Denham
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Kerry Denham

Nah it's okay. I'm not bothered anymore I have better things to do. If I need to get in touch about it, I will.
Listen to the Living
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Listen to the Living

No, i said that Oli was posting things i wasnt happy about because he was posting about his heart problems. Which you know.. is one of the MANY reasons for the admin rules. I said Mia needed to post more, and yeah.. for once you got something right. I never insulted Caroline. You know you nearly destroyed this page from the start Kerry.. the other admins are new.. they wont understand but Oli and i are happy to see you go. :')
Kerry Denham
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Kerry Denham

I'm happy to go :,). Goodnight.
Listen to the Living
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Listen to the Living

Happy? Great. Atleast what i gain from this is not having to be shown anymore fucking cuts.
Kerry Denham
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Kerry Denham

I'm aware I didnt help anyone anyway because we all know I'm a self centred waste of space. Sleep well. You showed yours too so don't whine about that.
Listen to the Living
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Listen to the Living

Anyone who sees this? Ima be posting soon about having more guy admins so if you have any friends you think might be interested, let me know? Wonderful. Night everyone. ~S
Listen to the Living
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Listen to the Living

Kerry, im having the links traced asap, my heart problems affect me massively and in my defence they were mentioned before I left.

THINK ON YOUR SINS.
-oli
Listen to the Living
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Listen to the Living

I keep my sleeves up all the time, you rolled yours up JUST to show me. Little bit of a difference. And yes Kerry, we all do know that.

they were mentioned before the new rules Oli.
Kerry Denham
'bout 7 turn o' yer hourglass ago
Kerry Denham

I'll message you on your personal Oli.



So yeah,.. wonderful friend huh.

April 13th..

So at 5:57am today i turned 17.
The age itself isn’t a big deal to me..
Nor is the fact it’s my birthday really..
But i changed my facebook settings last night to see who would remember (hid my birthday)
List of people who’ve said Happy Birthday without me mentioning it to them:
My parents. Kerry. Alex. Natalie. ..and then Ookie but she’s 3 minutes younger than me.
My boyfriend kinda forgot but i’ve not been with him very long and i don’t think i ever mentioned the date to him so he doesn’t count..
My Grandad forgot.. but he’s old so it’s okay.
I’ve already cried a fair bit today.. like always. I always cry on my birthday.
I guess i just feel like shit because i’m alone right now. I’ve been very very lonely all day even when i’ve been with people.
And loads of people are saying happy birthday to Ookie (she has it on facebook) but we’ve always made a big deal about joking that our birthday is the same day.. i guess nobody really picked up on it.
It’s not a big deal.. it’s only a birthday.. There’s just so much more shit going on in my life and it’s this one little thing that’s getting to me and pushing me to feel even worse.
Hardly anyone remembered.

Oh a blog..

Howdy doody blog!!
Bloody hell it's been a while.
I don't even know how to update my life anymore it's so FUCKED.
I'm tired of everything.. just so tired.
My boyfriend's been kinda off with me for days.. which is just wonderful cause i literally just got with him.
And i've cried for like 3 hours night before last night.. 5 hours last night..
And i feel so alone and lost and BLEGH
And.. i turn 17 tomorrow.
.. i'm amazed i've made it this far.
Kinda debating changing my birthday on facebook and not mentioning it to anyone so see who remembers.. probably nobody.
I just don't wanna spend another night on my fucking own..

Fuck everything.

..this is just how i'm coping right now..
Because i'm crying a lot.. and nobody gives a shit and this helps.

"When i grow up i wanna be nothing at all."
Because all around me everyone is planning their futures.. even the ones who are struggling because they're like "oh ima fail this exam.. but be okay in this.. and next year i'm taking.." and i don't even know if ima be here tomorrow.
I mean i'm okay just now.. but this happens EVERY night to me.. every day i cry a few times due to numerous breakdowns.. and every night i sit here for hours, on my bed with me legs crossed and i cry.
And i tried sit ups.. they don't help. Music doesn't help. Talking doesn't help.
I guess typing is all i have.. because these thoughts.. i can't let them stay in my head.. No matter how much i struggle with the words.
But yeah.. everyone around me is planning SOME sort of future.. and then there's me.. and sure people care but it's hollow.. it only goes so far. And i appreciate the support that i'm offered, i really do, but despite everyone i'm still alone, i still feel empty.
When i grow up, i wanna be nothing at all.. because that's all i am right now.
Right now, i am nothing.

15/3/13

I'm actually getting tired of doing the chasing..
I know how bad i am and i try to make up for it.. i try really hard..
I'm sorry i'm there too much, i'm sorry i breakdown, i'm sorry i put fucking kisses on texts and give you notes and kiss you longer than you probably want..
But i tried.. i really did.. and normally i don't try for anyone i'm just whatever.. but i really did try..
And i was right.. i got crushed again.
I'm always right.

NOT PREGNANT

Fuck yes. ♥ And i went on the pill today.. yeaaaah. ♥

14/03/13

Doctor says i seem okay cause i cant talk fine to him.. but i'm not.
I guess i was trying so hard to hold back the fake smile but it seeped through a little.
Oh well. No pills.
I tried my best to make everyone see i'm not okay..
Without you know.. offing myself.
So i think.. i think i might just make some tea.. and watch a movie or something.. cause this is a mix of sad, lonely, lost and scared and it's getting a bit tiring.. so tea seems like a good idea.. yeah.. tea..

04/03/13

.. He likes Disney movies. ♥

02/03/13

Been with Taidgh for one week.
Next Saturday i get to spend the day with him..
Weekend after he's away..
and after THAT ima stay over at his house for the weekend.
I can see him.. almost every day.. it's been so long since i've felt this safe.