That is utilitarianism. In Farewell to arms, Hemmingway's main Character is in Solferino and an explosion happens in the middle of a convo in a large foxhole and he is the only one left alive. Nobody jumped on a grenade there. But then there was a movie called TOP SECRET where one of the bat mans the Val Kilmer dude whom people say I look like, well, he jumps on a grenade to save everyone in the room and then everyone else gets blown up. So that was like a reverse Hemmingway.

Utilitarianism is doing something that helps more people in the end. Sacrifice is a human concept, I doubt there are animals who would act like this.

Although humans in the past have sacrificed animals to make them learn a lesson. Since they don't sacrifice themselves.

And anyways the only way to be human, the only way to live is to take chances, and if you are going to be inhibited and worried about what would go wrong if I did this, would someone else die if I saved 5 others, then you are a loser.

When peace is broken and there is a situation you have to think fast and do something quickly. Peace must be maintained, even the law realizes that in certain situations when there is an act of god, humans have to counter act these disasterous situations by acting executively and making a firm judegment at the time to save the day, and if you make a mistake, well, it may not have been the right thing to do, but we are human and are alotted mistakes. The law looks away from heros that fail.

When I was in my first college, I lived with a group of rich young Long Islanders in a dorm before I got kicked out for not taking showers, vandalizing, fighting, walking around in a robe, barefoot, being disrespectful to teachers, waiting for others to talk in classbut it was always, in what ever class I would go, me and the teach. I would sit in the back row and converse with the prof.

Anyways, so one day we are passing a bottle of Jack Daniels around and some one opens a bag of Cheetos the wrong way and they spray on the floor so I go around drunk on my hands and knees and scoop up every last one of the puffs. Then we go into a room and we smoke some herb in a bong, and I am with a guitarist, and a guy named Dave Kurtzman, who also played guitar. I had begun playig guitar that summer when I turned 18. I went to my first guitar lessons and by the time I got to the corner where the mail box was I resolved to not to get another lesson, and teach myself through self discovery.


There was this musician named Roy Harper that Led Zeppelin used to like alot, especially Jimi Page, and the Zep 3 album that went platnum really fast and is very earthy and was done in a wooded area known as Bron-y-aur which came to be one of the best acustic guitar songs of all time, in fact it was on Physical Grafitti which was the best. I noticed that Before Roy Buchannan killed himself he came up with a Blues sound kinda Floydish, almost like a Pink Zeppelin.

Anyways, I mastered a tape with the Roy Buchannan death blues music of him in space before he suicided kinged himself to death, and I mixed it with a particular Roy Harper album that was new back in 86, and I ran up to my room away from the two guitarists and I grabbed the tape I mastered and I wanted to play it off to my friends before they kicked me out for being such an incorrigible beast. I took the sticker of the tape and I popped it on the mixed tape, and I wrote CONSTANT FLUX on it, and I said it was Pink Floyd working with Led Zeppelin.

Now there is a bootleg tape going around, with the energy of of that Grateful Dead album bong hit from 1986.

Clapton did work with Floyd, I guess that would be called Pink God, because Clapton was known as God up until the present day until he first hit the scene back with the Yardbirds in the mid sixties.

Females are in perpetuity attempting to keep their hind quarters reddened by going after the bad boys trying to displease them so they get hair raising proper spankings regularly. In fact this is why women always do the wrong thing at the wrong time, they like being punished. Obsession is great, for a person's whole life to hinge on you, that they can't live by themselves without you, is a great honor, that they would either kill themselves, or kill you, or better yet prove how much they need you by striking out early and often, to keep you in your place at his feet, washing his footsies with your long hair, pulled in the crib from corner to corner with a dunce cap on. Women love it, they always don't know what to do with a real man, a good man, and so they would rather get involved in the never ending saga of bad love, or good and perfect hate, so they feel something in the nothingess of their empty hearts.

Any job is a dead end job, about the only thing n life that makes life worth living is variety, that is the spice of life.

Artistry in life is living the life of an artist where you play your own games, not someone else's idea of reality, or what you have to do to be successful.

Now my brother says I am probably more normal than him, that kind of scares me. I am the freakazoid of the earth everyone knows what kind of alternative lifestyle I picked up in hell having become a whore when true love passed me by, they know I like blood, my own meaning, and

I only admitted to things when I thought I was dying. I would have told the truth anyways, that is me, but I went the extra yard because I had no life so I did everything else all the little things that make life interesting and run full circle, and now shit, when peeps see me coming they know who I am, they know what color clothes I like on women, they know how to tickle the hairs in my ears. Blah Blah Blah, and it is too late, they know what moves me. I have to go meet some eskimo girl who doesn't know who vampariah is and what he likes to do with phillups screwdrivers and slippery sleeping bags.

The truthful mouth more loose when death is abreast.

There are several dating methods that enfabric the history of the earth. There are pollen counts, lava ash counts in soil that are at layers when a volcano exploded, there is magnetism in rocks, there is half lives of radio carbon dating, there is phosphorus dating, and another more extraneous one. Also ice ages happen every 100,000 years, and magnetic pole reversal of the north and south poles that is recorded in rocks, so you know when a rock was made, whether it aligns with north or south.

Inside ice is also records of the dates of pollen count going back 100,000 years ago, 2 miles down in ice.

Now when you mingle bones of behemoths, which are mentioned in your bible, and they exist at levels which go beyond the recorded history of the known world then, why they didn't even know America was where your ass is sitting right now. They thought the earth was flat.

And for Galleleo Galleli he echoed Copernicus theory that the sun was the center of the solar system, and they made him recant this stuff on his death bed and it turned out to be true.

Charles Darwin who created the term evolution, he said, that evolution does not go against creationism, they are not mutually exclusive.

I mean Darwin on his trips to the Galapagos found that in 8 years the speciation changed in beak size according to changing habitat. Also evolution has been witnessed in fruit flies which live for not even two days, and so they replicate very fast and change into different properties of abilities and gentics.

There are very few people who believe in the god of old these days, I think the people on the street who know about what happened to Vampariah, which seems to be everyone, have the understanding that we can potentially be gods, and the old buisness of we are not worthy is old hat, sorry to say.

The dating methods wrap around themselves. Once you actually know when a volcano in Siberia blew, and it matches with another dating method, and this happens the further down you dig into the erath, and even though some dating methods only go back 2-3,000 years, there are some that can connect the 3,000 year old dig date to one 50,000 and then an overlap from that goes back to 10-40 million, and then even further than that, it is the overlap effect of the various dating methods which make the dating precise.

No I just learned on forums to insult people to the degree to make them question themselves in their dens of pleasure and their dens of pain and to get out and do it all over again anew.

I think people are born, but some stop living. I will say I am guilty of this, my bluesy nature is the jaded heart of a life not allowed to be, I can ice the world and rise a decade later when I feel like it, because life has shown me that there was a reason why it was so cold to me, to make me warmer than a nearby star. Lack of love is an illusion. Once you realize hate is the sincerest form of flattery, and the emptiness of life is just the world wishing they could be with you until they made you better through their isolationism of you, then there is a time when everything you say is golden because you actually thought things through having not even a muse to talk to.

If you try to understand what I say you will lose the trip of it. In fact, it is so roundabout that when you get ot the end of it you fail to see how that snow ball flew, but you liked flying with it.

Well, the writing you did on writing made my hairs stand on end. That was very good and surprizing. I wish women wouldn't dry up with their writing when they get out of High School, I wish women would continue their diaries, it would make them more accountable, I wish more women would be real with their damn selves so that they can become great philosophers.

I have met about 3 or 4 great female writers in my life. IN various extravagent places, and I was quite impressed with their lyrical poesy.

I know they were better then me, and I would never write as well as them, even in my peak as a writer, I have a different form of passion from a woman. Women fabricate to draw in, I just don't give a damn, You either come to me or you are left out in the cold it is your choice.

I think everyone can potentially write, and the more you write the better you get at it, but I think the thing that makes a writer

is someone who has shoulders to hold up a head to stun an audience with a tongue from what they see with their eyes and make it commonplace observation with a new twist which ever way the diamond eye of the conversation turns, the rainbow of colors bursting out gives birth to butterflies.


I think you comment about characters coming to life was an excellent undersite I sometimes forget I have the power of doing myself. I cannot create characters on my own I always suck life force from existing peoples, that is my gift.

The thing that makes Churches holy ground is that initially there was a cemetery under them. I can see with my eyes closed now, and if I put up my hands in front of closed lids I can see what is under the church. St Mary's church here in Hunter's Point had quite a few bodies stuck under grill gates in coffins. That was such a clear vision. I saw a cemetery in Coney Island, a large one and there was two towers burning, two dark towers. I saw the Verazano Bridge and there was a white light over it, and

back at Saint Mary's last Thursday I woke up with no sanctuary and completely drained, and with no thighs no eyes, and no lower legs, I went where one of my protectors sits in the south west corner of teh church. Obviously there was a very powerful person buried under there, someone not damned, some one restng in peace in heaven. There was a bench to the left that rocked, I put my left foot on it and then I just sat there and absorbed the dead person's energy, it had to be a saint of some kind. There are many saints alive today, you have to be dead to be a saint, but there are good people who just be do and are, and they don't deal with lepers in India for attention, or whatever, some of you may be Saints.

I went to a bar this evening and I told these stories to J.D. I said look I will sense energy in here. Then I looked at the wall over his right shoulder and I saw the brightest light that I had ever seen since last Thursday or Wednesday when I realized I had these powers. There were 3 sisters behind the wall, all growing up. I know one of their names, they are all blonde and they always smile when I walk by, and I would walk through fire to protect them. I was blinded by their energy, it was amazing. You had to be there.

Also a documentary movie maker brought an 11 year old into my apartment, she sucked me dry, I was whole better than I had ever been and then the next day I was nothing but a wraith. Obviously the prepubescent girls have the highest energy. You have to stay away from them if you are trying to get out of hell, they will kill you, suck all the good right out of you. I guess, if I was to analyze it, they are blossoming sexual creatures so they steal mojos in order to be more feminine and gain the libido. I believe my hunch has some veracity.

Vampariah

Shawn I crossed over, here is what I did. I sinned right somehow. I know you couldn't tell me, because the ones who are allowed to make the cut are the just, anmd this is something that one has to be guided by their own devices. The psychic told me how to approach the final test. There are other like me, and they don't know what to do.

They will not find the answer here, but the ones reading will understanbd what to say to guide them. PLease keep this up. Thanks and say hello to the girls, I love them because I know them. I think my subsrciption runs out on the 19th of December, try to schedule a web cam chat before then.

MS is auto immune thing

I had MS presursor, but the body stopped attacking itself when I flip flopped so that the body parts that were not a part of me became a part of me, when the immune system crossed over too.

I cured MS by preventing it

There is no cure for MS as of now

once you have it, you cna never get rid of it

I didn't know how I was going to do it, but I did

you see icons are icons because of individuality, the ability to think freely and being different in a world where everyone is out to get someone, the only ones who can make the transition and receive the godhead are the ones when at the cross roads, they make the right choice

the right choice is thus

do you do the wrong thing at the wrong time, and this makes it right?

or do you do the right thing at the right time?

The right thing would be that the individual considered for judgment by nature makes the decision whether they will cover their own butts, or whether they are going to take a chance, that their passion, to not live in a compromised form?

When in life radicality is the thing that drives the present into the future and all innovation invention and discovery is found by taking the chance by smiting the self, and being diffrent from the others who only care about themselves, when the sacrifice of the body is made, nature rewards the individual with longer life.

The immortality of fame is bestowed upon the ones who have the courage to go against the self, to constantly do things that are not allowed, to break barriers, to dare to be different, to always make the wrong choice and be experimentative. I have always made the unique choice to go against the grain that other would naturally do. I am not human I never was, I had the power to smite the self and see if I would survive. This time I just wanted out, the game was not fair, and I gave up, I did not do the thing that would have preserved the self, as evil would have done, and therefore at the time of judgment, evil does make the wrong choice, self preservation goes against the community, I can and did have the power and strength to err, I have always been candid, for in erring one is human, and the truth is found by being daring. The seeker of truth finds it, when he does not like it and he wants to die because he cannot stand in judgment, he gives up at the moment it counts the most, and he chooses oblivion instead of self preservation, and this made all the difference in the world to always take the path least travelled.

Joyce

I will not live for ever, but because I understand things as only a strong spirit can dare to go, to receive the collective unconscious from the truth of the reality of life is the greatest gift.

To be taught things is to never learn. In order to learn one must feel it. One must walk through fire, fear, insecurity, self preservation are for ordinary people, they will all not pass the test. Fear is worse than all, fear will drive one mad, fearing makes them come true.

I fused my left brain into my right, and the interface is clean. However I must be balkanced right now I am fragile, annd i had to show up at a basketball game to be available for the playoffs, and I awoke maybe before I was ready, but I awoke with a start so I may have cut it right, I did some mathematics, and I was satisfied. But fear, as the formication happens, is imperative, while the whole brain is rewired to wrok with the brain chemicals as they were meant to as when I first came out for the first 33 years of my life, the feeling of ants crawling up my body, I let into my brain, and I was open to it. I did not have fear or paranoia when it happened. Then as the third eye, window to the soul opened, and I had the third chance to rewire my brain right, as the left brain downloaded into the right, I hypnotised myself to have the prime directives I wished to guide me.

I said 1) I am a teacher, I am a teacher, I am a teacher

2) respect children

Now, when all those voices of my left brain united with my right, they are ordered and my priorities are clear. It was cool. I was thinking about something, and i heard an echo in the back of my head say, almost audible, "I am a teacher".

I knew I had to brain wash myself, because I knew what was happening

it is not the eyes are the window of the soul, it is the third eye right between the eyes, which is the center of the gemini, it is the Agna chakra point. it is the chakra point that most people have fear when it happens, I controlled the fear, I had no fear, and so my brain has been rewired right.

I am also playing the guitar again to keep it simple stupid

obsessing about things leads to madness, it drains the brain rather than filling it, I am eating berries for dopamine, turkey for seratonin, I am going to my old shrink that dismissed me so long ago "if you are not crazy and you don't need medicine why do we meet once a month?"

Yeah doc, you are right, but if I ever need you or if I learn about something I wish to teach you I will contact hyou again

my door is always open she said

The doctor took my blood pressure today, and I think I already told you it was perfect, and he said I was manic, well, I opened up to him to show him where my mind was at all the things I was considering, how to get norepinephren and epinophrine, and not take other neuroleptics that put pepople on couches and make them get diabetes and gain 50 pounds.

he was angry, I told him look, I am not going to go mad, I know how madness works, it is a brain imbalance, I have no fears, I am secure, and I am playing guitar to not think so much

and he looked at me so proud

I took control of my life

The psychic I visted and paid 35 dollars for when I got off the train from Rhode Island

she spoke in generalities, she said that I pretend to be happy and that I could live better but I have a wall I hide behind

she said you must remove the block and be more free

I was like no, you are wrong I am the most free person I have ever met

she said no, you place limitations on your self, because you think you are ill, it is manifest destiny where the right mental approach is the correct philosphy. The philosophy of how an individual approaches life is what drives it to their destiny, it is the most important thing.

All these years you think you have been sick, you think I can't do this and then you can't. you must remove the block

and so I went around after that and lived hard and strong, and this made a difference in this 7 day test of further judgment where I have to keep at the world and onlyh fall asleep when it is absolutely necessary, to sleep before the time comes, then I lose, I have removed the blockj and I am following life diligently and answering all life's responsible rythms. Mental health I used to teach my kids when I thought I knew it all, is to go out and do and face life's problems. Life's problems infest your mind when you let things build up, and then you are trapped paralized, and overwhelmed.

That 35 dollars was the best thing I could have thrown my money on, as I left I thought I should have been the one to give her a reading, but, you cannot tell people how to make the right choice at the crossroads, thenit is not their choice and the benfits are lost, judgemnt by widom of intuition is the key, to be natural and to do unconsciously without thinking the right thing always which turns out to be the wrong thing,

when I keep doing the wrong thing at the right time, then that is me, and that is the thing that has always guided me, exceptionality in life is most rare, and when the individuakl cxeases to care abiut themself, that is the mark of a good man, and nature wants to keep the altruistic around, evil dies. Earth wants to live, the good whom undertake evil to understand evil to defeat evil, when they are a spy in the house of evil, they are at the bridge of lies, the crossroads of the devil, when they choose the wrong path for them, then they have made the right choice.

Life has always been backwards because of the devil = lived, backwards, the devil has altered life because of the worng done to children we will never overcome, so when all good deeds get punished because people envy care most of all, and evil wins because the devil recruits people to be evil like him and to stop to care about others,
ultimately life is a rehearsal, and when the time of judgment comes because the angel left shoulder and devil right, the angel has left so you want to leave life, life is totally fake and even if the devil appears right, you know that truth is a lie and the lies are truth, and so I went the other way away from life and I was rewarded. In peace.

It was amazing Kristen, I kmnow it sounds crazy, but I have always been candid.

Posted by Vampariah on Thursday, November 30, 2006 at 10:30 PM

Actually, in order to prevent cataracts in the eyes, the birth defect, one has to look at all compass points N>E>W>S>

and focus on a light until the light goes away in your eyes, that is the moment when one hemisphere drowns it out, and the other takes over, then for a moment there is a union between the two and you got stereoscopic vision.

You also have to face North East.

So I was on the Greenpoint bridge looking at the moon, showing the backs of my hands to the moon face, dust like how I created a dust storm doing that trick with the sun, you see the sun is more powerful....

and what happened ? You had to be there... tingely feelings, was a sdign to move on, I reattached my retina in 5 easy steps. Now I can make more kids than just the girls and boy as before, I made a mistake to make one more boy, so that is up to 6, and then I was able to make 10 females, and then by stealing the Y chromosome from my father, by sleeping in his bedm where I used to sleep, and soulamte slept, I got her energy in me, I switched directions and got feet soul in my head, I put my head in 7 years of sleeping tummy, and though I almost died, 3 times, I came back stronger, much stronger.

Now I think I have to lie down on my stomach, then flip over. Maybe do that a couple of times. A girl had a studded belt around her jeaned ass, she made my Zebra Leno head tingle, I wanted to dip her in chocolate sauce over and over again, but fortunately she left the room, because the pool stick in my hands was beginning to grow obscenely.

Yeah anyways, so I looked at the lights for a long time, and then I looked away, on the bridge, and I saw first one of the evil empire ships X wings fly by spinning in a spiral, which was just a shadow of what I had seen. I think it rolled to the right.

Then I saw Han Solo's millenium falcon, wow, typing in SOLO made my fingers tingle I guess I better go

Did someone say Darth MILKY WAY ?